© 2016 Eltham Counselling

PO Box 981Eltham

Victoria 3095

Australia

Please get in touch to make an appointment or enquiry.

You can reach us at the clinic on
(03) 9431 3933

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October 30, 2017

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All those in the front line of providing Health services such as GPs and psychologists, well know that getting men to seek help is sometimes a battle....

Help Men to Seek Help

October 30, 2017

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7 Ways to Improve Intimacy

 

  1. Accept Personal Responsibility: (Most important).  This means that you learn how to take responsibility for your own feelings and needs and refuse to blame your partner for not making you feel happy and secure.  This also means learning to treat yourself with kindness, caring, compassion and acceptance instead of self-judgement. 

  • When you learn how to take full, 100% responsibility for yourself, then you stop blaming your partner for your unhappiness.  Blaming your partner for your unhappiness is the number one cause of relationship problems – learning how to take loving care of yourself is vital to a good relationship.

 

2.  Compassion, Understanding and Acceptance:  Treat your partner the way you would like to be treated. 

 

3. Be Open to Learning:  When conflict occurs, you always have two choices:  you can become open to learning about yourself and your partner and discover the deeper issues of the conflict, or you can try to win, or at least not lose, through some sort of controlling behaviour. 

  • For example, most people have two major fears that become activated in relationships:  the fear of abandonment – of losing the other – and the fear of engulfment – of losing oneself.  When these fears are activated, most people immediately protect themselves against these fears with their controlling behaviour.  But if you choose to learn about your fears instead of attempting to control your partner, your fear would eventually heal.  This is how we grow emotionally – by learning instead of controlling.Make sure you have regular dates:  Intimacy cannot be maintained without time together.

 

4. Make sure you have regular dates:  Intimacy cannot be maintained without time together.

 

5. Gratitude instead of Complaints:  Positive energy flows between two people when there is an ‘attitude of gratitude’.

 

6. Fun:  Intimacy flourishes when there is lightness of being, not when everything is heavy.

 

7. Service:  A good way to develop intimacy is to have shared projects.

Source:  Mental Health Academy

 

 

“Love is the ability and willingness to allow those that you care for to be what they choose for themselves without any insistence that they satisfy you.”Wayne Dyer

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